I lost it!

I can't believe I lost it! Where did it go? I had it just a second a go. It was right in my hand, then I set it down, and...

Crap.

It fell into the Crack Between the Seat and Center Console (CBSCC). And you know that nothing ever comes back from that. I'm deadly serious. NOTHING ever seems to come back from that most horrid place.

It's all because of the Black Hole beneath the seat. I swear to you, there is one. You know how you drop something in the car, right? And now matter how hard you look, you can NEVER find it. You can rummage and dig beneath the seat but whatever you were looking for is long gone.

My marker wasn't the only victim that fell prey to the dreaded Black Hole. There was once a hat, a pair of shoes, some eyeglasses, perhaps a shirt or two, some socks, a book, innumerable amounts of pens and other writing utensils, and I think some wine glasses that my grandma had once set on the floor of the car. They're gone now, of course, but they were once there, believe it or not.

Every now and then, very, very rarely, some various item that you once spent hours looking for would pop up seemingly out of nowhere. And you look at it...and you laugh, because you don't need it any more.

Yeah and I almost lost a finger to the Black Hole and the CBSCC. I'm telling you, it was being pulled from my very hand...but I snatched it back! And I reclaimed my finger! It may have taken my markers, but it would not take my finger!

It's quite scary, really, knowing there's a Black Hole underneath your bottom. You can't help but get the feeling that your butt might get sucked in at any moment...

NO BUTT! That's disturbing.

As I sit here, frantically rummaging for my permanent marker, I realize that perhaps the Black Hole is there for a reason. Maybe it's trying to say that we have too much, and is trying to show us the meaninglessness of material value. Maybe there's some big lesson here...

NAH!

I'm going to keep looking, and maybe find some other useless article from the Beyond...